I also know and am close to many black people and to a person they don’t ask or expect any of us to be devoid of racism, they only ask that we are aware of the ways we might be affected/infected by it, and ask ourselves questions about that. And this is what so many white people just refuse to do. They go right to denial.
I never say “I’m not a racist” simply because I was raised in this country as a white person and it is impossible not to internalize what is in the history and thought-process of a nation. That said, I do lay claim to a willingness to self-examine that I try to renew on a daily basis.
I wrote this piece about “anonymous privilege” as a way to help white people understand one way we are privileged even when we have hardly a dime or name.
https://medium.com/@markolmsted/what-anonymous-privilege-is-and-why-you-should-know-de12253a5514